I don’t remember there being coffee shops back in the
mid-1990s when I embarked on the dating scene.
I have consumed more coffee in the last several months then I
have in my entire life.
The safe first meeting normally takes place middle of the
day at a coffee shop. I have met men at
10am; 1pm; 3pm; time of the day doesn’t really matter. It is all about the coffee.
I have burnt my mouth in attempt to end the date as quickly
as possible. And there were times with only two sips into my latte that it
become obvious why he is single. And I have nursed the same cup and talked for
over four hours; enjoying every sip and wondering why someone let the man in
front of me go.
I must say that with every cup, I find a new sense of
confidence and clarity of what I am not looking for. It is much easier to identify what we don’t want
vs what we want. I have shared a cup with a former police officer; CPA;
therapist; professor; business owner; and the list goes on.
In my twenties, I looked for a partner thinking of my future
and not so much of the present. I wanted
a man who desired a family and was dependable and safe. At 51, I am not looking toward my future as
much as I am looking at the present. I just
want to savor the cup in front of me and not think about refills. And I am definitely not interested in purchasing
an Espresso Machine together.
Swiping is the easy part.
He profile states conservative – left; he has children below the age of
10 – left; he is separated – LEFT; he is super religious – left; his profile
picture has a dead animal – LEFT; he smokes – left; and the famous picture in
front of the bathroom mirror, shirtless – LEFT, and someone please tell him to put
some clothes on.
After all the swiping is complete, there is a smile that it
exchanged followed by the standard list of questions and answers that Siri has
learned enough that she can fill in the rest without any efforts on my
part. And if for some reason neither of
you haven’t made the other run, block, delete, and swear that you will never logon
again; there is a cup of coffee in your future.
My Mr. Right is out there.
I just haven’t found the perfect blend.
Barista, I’ll have a soy latte. One cup at a time…
